rockydeadhead

No, not on Ebay, but close. Though the former would probably have been more lucrative. Hm....

Anyway, I found a place to live. Got a room in university accomodations through sheer dumb luck. It's really central (as in 'I can walk to the Alex'), cheap and spacious. I can move in on the first of september. Nice. I also wrote 13 job applications just after I got through the door. Didn't get a reaction to any of them, so I went back to the call centre. Bills, very unfortunately, don't pay themselves, right. Anyway, I had just re-entered the treadmill, when I got a phone call. Call centre. Free at least twice a week till Christmas? Training. MONEY! That's pretty much what the conversation boils down to. So, I signed up for at least two days a week. The pay is decent and the work less unpleasant than usual, so: all good. Unfortunately, that was just when several other potential employers also decided I'm little miss popular and got in touch. One is cool, doesn't get a move on and would probably lead to much chaos and amusement, but unfortunately hasn't made an actual offer, yet. The other is rigidly organized, serious and evil. I had to solve nasty logic-brainteasers during the interview. Nya. But I got an offer. A Paid Internship, starting on monday until my new semester starts, with the possibility of them taking me on in a more permanent part-time function afterwards. So far so good. Would mean I spend my weekends getting up early, running to the library to pick up my books, go to work, get back, write essays. Sleep. Repeat five times. Sleep in a little on weekends, write essays, go to work, sleep. Repeat twice. Go back to step one. Hm... ...
Oh, the company? A venture-capital investment company, exploiting cheap chinese labour among other things and I'd be working in their marketing department. Do you think hooves might be a problem when wearing pumps?
I think I'll probably take the offer, though... It does sound like I'd learn a hell of a lot in a rather short time (or else) and hey pay me for it.
It also means I have three days left to, ahem, *freshen up* my knowledge of html.
On the up-side: I joined the pirate-party.

Your,

slightly surlfury

rocky deadhead

Oh yeah, as I already outed myself as working for Big Bad, I really, really don't like babies. At least not six of them in a crowded, enclosed space several thousand meters above ground, like, say, airoplanes. Or rather, I don't like parents, who take babies on planes. Forget about snakes, at least those are quiet and they don't smell. Or puke. Or fart. Or throw things. On the note of throwing things: I first battled the overwhelming desire to throw said babies' parents out of a window when we were flying over Mongolia. Yes. I spent twelve hours surrounded by six babies. Crying babies. Six of them. Well, to be fair, they never cried all at the same time. They took turns.

Okay, I had almost resigned myself to the prospect of coming back to Germany. Almost. I guess, I should thank dear prospective Flatmate for reminding me why that is a very bad idea indeed.
In short: I had exchanged several e-mails with a guy concerning a room in central Berlin. A room for a very reasonable, price, I might add. Okay, the room has character - like coal heating, the shower in the kitchen, and a communal loo one floor down - BUT, hey, withing walking distance to uni, 24 sqm, and all that for 160 Euros, incl. bills. Hell, I'd take a twice daily hike to the loo for that!
However, we left it at 'We'll meet up to look at the place on the 12th, unless something unforseen happens, in which case I'll mail you'. Yeahhhhhhhhh... that...
I just wrote him a message to confirm the date, und luckily so, because the reply I got read something like this: "Yeah, sorry 'bout that, kinda decided on someone else a while ago. Good luck an' all.' ...
That carries a particular sense of irony, considering I've been defending europeans and their supposed (now proven) habit of breaking promises towards my Japanese friends on a number of occasions.

Ahhhh, it's so nice to come home (insert sarcasm). I haven't even set foot on that plane and I already feel my misanthropy rekindling. Cheers.

On the upside, I have one date for looking at a room set up for sure (unfortunately for monday evening, guess what sort of glorious impression I'll make after a 14 hour flight). The new room is 40 Euros more expensive including all, is only half as big, but does actually include central heating and a bath room. With a shower AND a toilet. Wow, right?! The location is just as good, iff somewhat less fancy, which would suit me just fine.

What annoys me most: No problem getting rejected for the room. Hey. But had that little wa*ker informed me of it, as he had promised, I would have responded to various other ads much sooner. I'm sure I'll find a place to suit my budget and requirement, but seriously, is a bit of common decency really that hard? Well, it sure isn't common.

Anyway. I had a really nice evening tonight. And it looks like tomorrow is going to be good as well.

On that note, I'll be off to slay some monsters before bedtime,

nightly nighty

your rather disillusioned Deadhead

...after realizing that last posts' reasoning on why I don't wanna come back doesn't really make sense.
Hm, well, a lot of it certainly has to do with the prospect of a distance relöationship. Second BIG factor is that receiving a scholarship and not having to pay rent is *nice* - realize, of course, that that is hardly the norm in Japan either. Quite the contrary. Private universities are EXPENSIVE! Hells bells! And looking at the sort of stuff my roomie does in her seminars - it isn't all that much value for money, seriously. Still, it feels like I've gotten a break from real life and I'm not to eager to go come back to it. It's a hell of a lot nicer to have nothing bigger to worry about than a couple of Tests and whether to go to the Pub later. Compared to: What the f**k am I going to do with my life, where am I going to live, where's my rent going to come from and how am I ever going to pay back the debt I've run up... for example.
Of course, there're things I'm looking forward to, like my friends (hello!), certain seminars, no more sneaking in through the bl**dy kitchen window... Yet, I could really get used to the general tone used around here. I'm not looking forward to entering a supermarket, pretty much knowing that someone is going to vent their bad mood at me, and me having to try really hard not get into a pissy mood myself. My misanthropic streak has actually started to mellow considerably since coming here. I'd much rather take being stared at. As others already said, you get used to it and I actually find it quite amusing these days. Also, I'd contest the view that Japanese people are neccessarily all that polite (not to foreigners, anyway) but it's still so much nicer to get on an overcrowded train and actually find people - who've most likely just been through an insane working day - smiling.
I'm going to miss the people here, as well. The crazy Boogies Crew, for example. Also, I'm just beginning to feel like I'm starting to make progress in Japanese. At least sometimes, *ahem*. Having to go back *now* sucks.
But, muahaha, I had a very amusing moment in ththe national library the other day. I was sitting in one of the reading rooms, minding my own business and reading an essay from a compendium on comparative folkloristics - in Japanese. First of all I was happy as a clam that I could actually read an essay in Japanese in the first place (using a dictionary, of course). But what really made my day was the middleaged Japanese guy sitting right opposite me, intently staring at me and my book, brow furrowed and wearing this incredibly irritated enxpression, like: She can't possibly be able to read that. Why is she able to read that? Why can a foreigner read Kanji?! They aren't supposed to!
*mentally sticking my tongue out* It's kinda nice to be able to prove common prejudices about foreigners wrong from time to time. It's kinda exhausting to constantly feel like I'm being on trial, and as soon as you step out of line, it's going to fall back on the image of every foreigner who has ever entered Japan, but then again: the looks I get when I get up to offer my seat to some frail old lady on the train are priceless. "But foreigners can't possibly behave themselves!" Up yours ;). Possibly not entirely in the spirit of good manners, but hey.

In short: I've gotten used to Japan, I like it here, I'm having fun, things that used to royally piss my off in the beginning have actually grown on me. Oooh, I've started to love that cold green tea I used to hate at first! It's really nice, has a sort of nutty, tangy flavour. Funny how taste changes... maybe I should give Nattô another try...
Well, there are more things I'll miss about Japan than I currently miss about Germany, thus - Nope, not happy about having to get on that plane.

Okay, rather a lengthy, self absorbed bit of rambling... anyway. sonna kanji ;)

I'm a bad friend. I know. Well, at long last: Hi!

Everything's going well at my end. Well, except for the bit where I have to go back to Germany in just over two months and I really, really, really don't want to. Although I am looking forward to seeing most of you, ne. :)
Pissy, bad tempered people everywhere, badly paid annoying jobs, bored bureaucrats on a power trip and a government that's really bad for my blood pressure. I am going to join the pirate party. Don't know how many of you picked up on the debate revolving around a proposed law presumably supposed to barr peados from accessing child porn, practically pretty useless and potentially giving a green light to arbitrarily censoring the internet. There was an online petition against it, which about 90.000 people signed (with names and addresses) within a week. Me amongst them. To my endless joy (insert heavy sarcasm), the legislative tried to ignore it at first, then belittle it, and finally resorted to publically shaming everybody on that list as a supporter of child pornography and potential sociopathic pervert. I make use of my civic rights and get labeled a potential criminal in return?! I'll give you sociopath! Anyway, I know every country has its individual problems and all, but elsewhere I can at least console myself with the idea that I didn't vote the arsehole in charge into office.

Okay, this wasn't supposed to turn into a rant. Erm..., well yes, other than my overwhelming unwillingness to go back I'm doing good. Still struggling with the Japanese obsession with 'pattaaaan' (patterns)in class (I'm not good at not sticking out). Also, I recently went to the pub with friends the night before a presentation and then more or less successfully blagged it on a few hours of sleep and with very little in the way of preparation. But by and large I think I found a good balance. I do what I have to, get decent grades and have enough time to spare for things I want to do. Like read, look at stuff, play videogames, spend time with L.B., meet friends and bum around the national library. I think I really might try and give academia a try. Think I can take buzzing around the library like a kid in a candy store as a sign I might be on the right track? I'm actually looking forward to the essays I still have to write before the start of the next semester. (And yes, I do realize I'll probably regret saying that once the deadline actually approaches)

Anyway, gotta go to class. Politics. The irony. ;)

Your, actually pretty happy,

Rocky Deadhead

I don't know how to revise for the upcoming placement test. I don't want to screw it up again, but I honestly don't know how to prepare... To the people who were here last year: Any good advice?

So far, my battle plan mainly involves playing lots of Japanese videogames and revising Kanji. Hm.

Oh, I bought a lovely, shiny, almost new DSi. Great love. *happily stroking its matte black cover* All for the sake of study, of course. Roomie and I taught German to a bunch of Japanese student for three days (for about six hours a day) and got a good wad of money for it. Just enough to by a second hand console in very good condition and a game. Of course, I didn't just by one game in the end and will probably survive on cabbage stew for the near future - but it's so worth it!

Other than that... these holidays were awesome. Was more than just a little apprehensive about having that much free time with nothing to do, but I must say: Could get used to it. The travelling, the dates... oh - LB went to the national museum with me. Great fun to stand in front of the exhibits and go 'What is THAT?!' 'Not a clue'. And he's going to come to the Kabuki with me. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh. Oh, had I mentioned that I went to see a Noh-play while in Kyoto? Awesome. And it was almonst as much fun to watch the audience as it was to watch the play. The entire first row was sound asleep, some sleeping on their neighbours shoulder.
Oh, AND I understood the Kyôgen!! The actual play - not a chance. Luckily I head a leaflet with the plot outline in English and it turned out the whole thing revolved around scenes from Heike Monogatari.

Anyways.
Pointer as towards revision would be much appreciated.

Byebye,
La Deadhead

Want food, unfortunately I'm too lazy to get up and make breakfast - or alternatively get dressed walk aaall the very far way to the nearest Combini (a whopping two minutes walk away) and buy some. Well, I have coffee, so the worst crisis is averted.

じゃ, Roomie and I returned from a four day trip to Niigata yesterday. There is no way around it, I need to emmigrate to Japan. Sado-ga-shima is awesome! Really, really pretty, quiet, awesome food, best coastline I've ever seen, two enormous snow-covered mountain ranges running through it, picturesque little villages nestled inbetween craggy cliffs and bizarre rock formations... I think I fell in love. So, the island is also pretty much the end of the world. Or at least severely tilted in its direction. 65km off the Western coast of Japan towards Russia, with very little in the way of public transport and - as we found out the hard way - a rather flexible approach to bus schedules. I suppose if you'd grown up on the island you'd know that busses tend to arrive, and hence depart, up to fifteen minutes early especially in the morning (like, when you're trying to get back to the port to catch your ferry back to the 'mainland', and the next bus is two hours away). They also don't seem to get many foreigners around there. We managed to severely shock a bunch of a primary school kids and prompted an elderly gentleman to almost forget his lunch, as he was to busy staring to properly lead his spoon to his mouth. Other than that people were amazingly friendly (like the elderly couple who gave us a lift to the port after our little bus-related misadventure).
Very cool. Echigo-Yuzawa - which I wanted to go to because I'm still a little literature geek/groupie at heart - turned out to be a mixed success. Wonderful, awsinspiring countryside, butt-ugly town. The nasty side of tourism. Anyway, I ventured into an Onsen. Public, NAKED baths are not something I'm going to get used to quickly, but the hot water and lovely building (one of very, very few) was worth it. Had some great food, some great Sake. Hmmm.
Which remids me... food... どうしよう?

Might take a first step by getting dressed.

Murphey's Law sucks male primary sexual organs. *pout* I haven't been using an umbrella since I got here, rarely carry one wherever else I might be and very rarely get ill. On tuesday, I succumbed to LoverBoy's worry-warting and let him buy me an umbrella (as a compromise - initially he attempted to bundle me into a taxi again), because it was raining. Anyway, I walked home using said umbrella, and promptly caught some mutant monster Godzilla cold. Now I look, feel and quite possibly smell like a drowned cat and missed out on a date. Lovely. By the way, does anyone speak JapaneseMan? Because I don't get... things. So far I have discovered, that dates are a no-no in snowy weather, because I live up on a hill, and as everyone knows hills are hideously dangerous things when covered in barely a dusting of immediately melting snow flakes. I had wondered, why completely indoor activities had previously been made dependent on the weather. *someone switches on the little metaphorical lightbulb*

Well, anyway. I'm feeling grouchy. I am suffering from severe withdrawal of body contact (how, HOW on earth is it, that Japanese people don't go completely off the rails in droves, considering couples can't even hug in public in the widest possible definition of the term!). AND I desperately crave sweets, but don't dare venture out looking like something out of Braindead. Admittedly in the early stages, without the blood or missing body parts. Hang on... no, I didn't get bitten by any exotic animals recently. Phew.
Okay, now before I delve into how an alien abduction may have caused my recent enthusiasm for all things girly, I will leave it at that.

By the way, messages and mails are very welcome! *hint**hinthinthint*

1.) I'm starting to like that bottled cold tea that tastes like it has cigarette butts swimming in it.
2.) I like mochi.
3.) I wear skirts.
4.) I wear flowery skirts that don't cover my knees.
5.) I proudly exclaimed: 'I own a dress that makes me look like a girl!' Roomie's comment: 'That's good?' Me: '... ... ... fuck...'
7.) I made valentines chocolates. And wrapped every single one in a little case made out of folding paper with brown and dark pink flowers on it.
8.) In listen to CHINESE pop music. And LIKE it!!!
9.) I read the Japanese equivalent of bodice-ripper novels. Seriously.
10.) I make inflationary use of the word 'niedlich' (cute).
11.) I squeal. While I say it.
12.) Right next to my schoolgirl-animeporn bedsheet a calendar of kimono cled, clemently smiling Japanese ladies graces my walls.
13.) While I sit here typing, I have a cuddly blanket with little teddy bear and strawberry print wrapped around myself.
14.) I admit to it.

*quivering little voice* Help?!

Yes, I have exchanged my brain for shoes.

Oh no, that's just what it looks like looking at my grades. Turns out I not only feel incredibly stupid half the time, I actually am. And irony over irony: I did really quite well on the bits I did fuck-all revision for, like grammar or kanji.

I had my usual blib in Listening comprehension. I wonder whether my brain shutting down after the first few words of a listening exam has simply turned into some kind of bizarre tradition between my intellect and myself: 'Hey, kikitori! Har har, think you can catch me before the exam is over, huh? Huh?! Im over he-e-ere...'
Really frustrating: I've gotten reasonably good at it in class!
Anyways, the real cake icing is still to come: The Oral of Doom. I prepared like a maniac, which - in Japan - appears to be a bad thing. Because everytime I try hard, my grades take a nose dive. Basically, we could only really prepare for the first part of the exam. We had to summarize a text with the help of notes provided by sensei 1. Said there were to be bonus points if you gave off the impression of having tried hard. Read: Those who have earned the prvilege by being cute and generally delightful may aim for bonus points, everybody else beware - it will have the very opposite effect. As I found out. I did prepare. Man did I prepare. I prepared a summary in blocks, so i'd be able to shift them around to accomodate examples from the teachers notes, I was realy careful with the grammar - slightly more complex sentences while only using grammar I actually know, no dictionary, so no risk of funny sounding vocab-misuse. We had five minutes for taking notes on here note after walking into the exam. Did. Said my piece. Stuck to the time limit. Tried to speak clearly. Didn't stumble over words. Ran short of breath a few times, but hey, no helping nerves. In short: I felt pleased as punch when I looked up at teacher after the exam. She looked back at me with a very stern expression, and I swear that was the first time I heard 'you put a lot of work into this' used as an accusation. And the really big Bad: I hadn't looked at the sheet while I was talking. Must be one of those cultural difference, because I understood 'speaking freely' to be a good thing. We got the grades back today. Didn't know whether to cry or... er, cry? The grades from the first oral are abysmal. Second one, unprepared and infinitely worse went a hell of a lot better. I got hefty deduction on practically everything!

That's it. I'm done with gambaru. I will only do my best when I have teacher's explicit permission to do so. Preferably in written form on university issued paper with a watermark, a date, and a signature. Fuck. You.

On the upside: I passed the Nikkyû.

Swallow that, suckaz. *joke*

Now, off to drink.

Holidaaaaaays!

Time to read for fun! I am actually looking forward to writing my essays for Berlin. Allowed to think again. Hey, no queue-jumping over there, I'm first in line at the brain-reclamation desk.

And a rant-free, happy, cheery entry will probably follow later. For now it feels good to vent.

I spent 25000 Yen on alcohol last months. Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Well, anyway. *ahem* Long time no see.
Where to start... New Years Eve was kinda cool. Spent it in Tokyo. First at a Temple, to listen the 108 bell rings. Which takes rather more time than expected. Then food. Then a rather long moment of 'we've got about four hours to kill before the first train back. Erm?'. We ended up in a Bookshop/Video place with integrated Starbucks in Roppongi and spent the next two hours drinking white chocolate mocha, listening to music that made me personally feel like I just got sucked into The Sims (the surroundings and everything so worked! Well, beats Resident Evil, I suppose), and talking about heaven knows what. Was fun. After that we ended up in a very nicely done English Pup and chatted to a verz extroverted Japanese guy, a slightly 'special' american army guy and three incredibly british british guys who looked a lot like James Bond.
I discovered how long one beer can last if you've paid about 9 euros for it.

Other than that... went to 初詣 (hatsumoude - first Shrine visit of the year) with Takumi. Japanese really are a pragmatic bunch, aren't they? I mean apart from おみくじ (omikuji - a way of fortune telling) vending machines, people decided - after waiting in line for close to two hours to get INTO the shrine- to try and avoid the last 5 minutes of queing for the 賽銭箱 (saisenbako, the place where you throw in your five yen, to your clap-clap routine and make a wish)by throwing the five yen from several meters aways. Means: the people at the front got bombarded by five yen coins. It's raining money! Ouch!

Hm, since uni started again, it's back to the grindstone. Tachnically exams start on frinday (with another test on the thursday before). But I still have a short essay in Japanese to write and a six page one in English for that online seminar I took part in. Intteresting stuff. Thought about taking a very recent Swedish movie as a topic. The - very significant - problem: I need literature. Our Library is Japanese. Only. Film theory in Japanese? Errr...I don't think I will make the deadline. Well, anyways. Quick break to de-blurgh my brain and then back to the books. Vocab revision on a hang-over! Yesssssss... *ahem*

Oh yeah, Merry Christmas everyone.

Weeeha!
Finally, the long anticipated holidays. So far they have been excellent. Classes until the 23rd, and rightaway a christmas party a few hours later. Yes! Having a costume christmas party seemed slightly, erm, unorthodox at first, but it turned out to be really good fun. Though someone will at some point have to explain to me the Japanese obsession with Bingo...
Christmas Eve was great. We prepared a huge meal complete with roast chicken together with the other Northern Europeans and four Japanese guys. Julklapp was funny, although one of the guys ended up with my present and looked rather confused at the sight of two bright pink, round bunny cups 8with ears!!!), instant, pink strawberry milk and pink and white chocolate. Well, it seemed a good idea when I bought it!
Other than that: I got an awesome 'build your own Mecha'-set and an anime porno bedsheet from the girls. Especially the latter caused some amusement and confusion. I like it *defensive face*
The end was rather abrupt thanks to our curfew *not going to rant... Ommmmmmm...*, but we had a few more relaxed drinks at Boogies, before everyone headed back home. The funny thing: We stuck to christmas tradition and all already ate much more than was probably advisable - and then Boogie and Mika gave us this lovely roasted chicken half, and I, for one, briefly saw myself spontaneously sporting feathers and a beak.
Yesterday was my lazy day.

Anyways, more posts to come. But for now I go back to being lazy. Bliss.

Hell-oooooo...

Sorry for not getting in touch nearly as often as I probably should. Kinda busy, with christmas approaching and my repeatedly failing attempts to balance uni and something vaguely resembling a social life. Which leads me to my rather permanent cause of frustration (other than non-existant linguistic talent on my part): Japanese teaching teaching methods. It's not even the teaching per se, more the ones doing the teaching that drive my batty. Seinsei No.1 is awesome, classic combination of old-school japanese lady and tough cookie. She's like the female, de-hollywood-ized and absolutely karate unrelated version of Miyagi sensei. Sensei No. 2 is growing on me. When she doesn't deal with us as a group, she seems to occasionally forget that we of little understanding of the Japanese language are neccessarily, and unvaryingly stupid and at times even forgoes the 'don't hurt yourself trying to think'-voice. Sensei No. 3... well, let me explain using an example: I missed a test this week due to illness. The test took place in second period, and I thought I'd better give it a shot anyway, so I went to the first class and pretty quickly discovered that that idea ranked pretty much up there with my decision to wear a lacy pink dress to school at the age of fourteen. I thus decided to head back to my room. To sleep. Which I did. But not without lengthy discussions with Sensei No. 3, who looked at me very gravely (I think - it was kinda hard to tell, as my eyes were watering rather badly) and pointed óut that I would receive a zero on the test if I didn't take it. Kay. Fine. She did, however, agree to talk to the other two teachers and see if I could repeat it the next day. Kay. Fine. Went back home, slept for five hours, looked and felt vaguely human again afterwards. Took the test: In a crowded classroom, during lunchbreak, without food or drink all day, but surrounded by chattering Koreans. Perfect. Still managed to do alright. Did reasonably well on the grammar part actually, and was starting to feel a little pleased with myself, until, and here comes the icing on the cake: Sensei number three informs me that ten points would be deducted from my grade for not taking the test the same day as the others. It hadn't been decided yet, but she was going to try and persuade the other two seinsei of her intention. Ten points deduction for getting ill. Well, fuck you very much! After having a hefty number of points deducted from my oral grade for using graphs that were 'too complicated' and having a hefty percentage deduced from an ESSAY THAT WAS ACTUALLY - FOR THE FIRST TIME - FREE OF GRAMMAR MISTAKES for the use of the incorrect type of BLOODY SPEECH BRACKETS, I am starting to get... irritable. Yes, I think I may be developing a problem with authority.
Other than that: Things are going well. I sleep little, rant a lot - nothing new there - and am generally reverting back to the mental age of sixteen. Erm, not many of you knew me as a teenager, right? *Evil snicker*

Anyways, I'm extremely looking forward to the holidays. The next couple of days will by taken up by various parties or their preparations, which is all fun, and after that I will sleeeeeeeeeep.
Hmmmmmm....

Okelidokeli, to put it in the much despised words of Ned Flanders.

One hell of a week over. Yossha!
Tests, everywhere, they are after me... well no longer. I'm currently experiencing another wave of sudden motivation, which may have to do with the feeling of getting better at - things. No mistake, I still sound like a spazz, but one that can converse on the peculiar potatoe washing habits of the Japanese Koujima-monkey, the finer chemical points of the water cycle and the temperature dependent movement of iron molecules. Now I only need to learn how to not sound completely stupid in ordinary day-to-day conversations... erm... yeah...
We also have a new teacher. Whom I couldn't stand in the beginning, with her semi-senile smile and 'don't hurt your soft little head'-voice still being enough to drive my mental movie projector to splatt-o-rama overkill. But unfortunately my ego is a week little suck-up that holds considerable sway over my sympathies and reacts very well to being stroked. So, teacher walking up to me in the dining hall, telling me I did very well on the presentation makes it very, very hard to dislike her. Bad ego. Stop wagging your tail.
What riles me most about her is her way of telling us not to bother with certain tricky but unfortunately neccessary grammar points like particles - wearing a tooth-ache inducing smile - because, oh my god, its, like, hard. No shit!

Other than that... everything is well. I think I may be making a Japanese friend, which is harder than it may sound, with not being to hold a coherent conversation and all, and I've been invited to a nomikai/drink meeting tomorrow, which sounds... a little scary?
I also got invited to a club activity. Yes!!! And had my first major flash of kawaiiiiiiii! at the art club yesterday. As i may have mentioned before, the art club is mainly frequented by short men. Which already led to a long round of 'lets see who's as tall as the foreign girl' (One, I kid you not, only ONE). Well, anyway, the - I think he's the vice-club-president - reasonably big, serious guy, appears to have a penchant for drawing insects and, wait for it: kitties. Kitties chasing bugs, kitties playing with flowers... well, kitties being cute, basically. So, there was a bunch of guys sitting around the drawing of a kitty with a dandelion, trying to copy it and at the same time trying to explain to me in simple Japanese that they were planning to have a watercolour workshop in a few weeks and would I like to come. Anyway, one of them kept telling them the words they were using were really difficult and the other two kept rephrasing over and over again. The amusing bit is that I'd already undestood what they were talking about, but they were so busy simplifying that I felt it would have been rude to let them in on that. Plus, I usually really don't have a clue what they're talking about. It's really nice that they were taking the trouble.
So yeah, very, very, very tired happy rock'n rolling Deadhead.
Oh yeah, and I'm single again. After what was probably the most uncomplicated break-up in history.

Okay, sorry about the repeated outbursts of frustration, but this journal's one of very few outlets. Frankly, I find it admirable, how well people have their temperaments in check over here, but to me it's incredibly hard to just put a stopper on it. Combined with frustrations about not being able to speak properly and sounding like a complete spazz everytime I attempt to say anything that isn't covered in the textbook.... er yeah, I have a tendency towards spontaneous outbursts. Bit like a bottle of sparkly - nudge the cork slightly and whooooom.

Anyways, little catchup: Last week was my birthday. Apart from having a Big Evil test (which didn't go so well; not seeing a question is cute only once, completely blocking out three of them...) it was my roommate and my turn to attend Doitsu-Dê: Two Germans sit in in a specified classroom and any Japanese students who feel like it can come along and have lunch together, chat, ask something, whatever. The atmosphere is always a little strange, but the idea is nice. And last week my roomie made chocolate cake and lots of people said happy birthday, which was very nice as I'm not really used to it. The night before the other three German girls and I sat in the smoking room, with beer, some ciggies, crips and chocolate until 2am. I love the smokingroom. Its drafty, a bit bleak, smells, but it has charm.

Anyways, got to run, we all have to give presentations on graphs today. Great joy. It 's a very useful topic, I'm sure, but my brain refuses to compute numbers in any given language. Should be interesting.

Do you think anyone would notice, if our three kanrinin went missing only to reappear - confused and without any identifying documents - in, say, Nicaragua?
I know I know, free rent, scholarship and all that, but goodness mutiny sounds great. Pass the rum?

Seriously, I can live with most rules, be they a mild annoyance, pointless, aggravating, a hinderance or downright insulting. But THANK YOU VERY MUCH make them at least apply to everyone irrespective of the vague physiological location of their dangly bits! Having friends who've come over to work on a university project almost thrown out of the *downstairs* computeroom, while visitor are free to roam the entire mens' dorms is adding one more insult to the injury of having to resort to sneaking in and out of kitchen windows when going to the pub at the age of 25, while the guys can stumple back at any given hour to find their building open. And that just the tip of the iceberg. And anyway: Even if I had my mind set on banging half the male university population, I am hardly going to do that in our bloody computerroom, am I?!
My inner feminist is standing on a mount of burning underwear, roaring with rage and toting a copy of Preciados Contrasexual Manifesto. Vive la Dildocratie!

Seriously.

At least I can amuse myself with thoughts of Japanese men, dressed and coiffed *like that* taking a walk around Neukölln. *evil smirk* I repeatedly find myself wondering 'how on earth did you manage to survive school, looking like that'. Then I take a look around and remember 'Ah yeah, japan. Everyone seems to be running around in pink, fluff, makeup, the occasional Pikachu-bodysuit, whathave'ya, and hairdo's that would do a San Francisco drag queen proud. One of many highlights, spotted by Jenny: A chavvy looking guy with short hair, bomberjacket, a golden necklace - and a Winnieh-the-Pooh-Tshirt peeking out from underneath.
Enjoy the mental image.

The Kengakusai is finally over. Every last cookie, every last bowl of Pastasalad was sold. We ran out of meatballs halfway through the last day. Piranha!
And I don't want to see - or smell - any of the above for a very, very long time. We were working for fourteen hours yesterday. To make that easier to imagine: From 8:20 until after ten at night. And baked over 1000 (One THOUSAND) thrice-damned, bloody cookies. Argh!
Plus: Japanese have a very weird workethic. The don't do breaks. Ever. Even if they look like they're about to drop. because other people would still be working. Means: Forget about working shifts. Impossible. Also means: The get very slow, unorganised, irritable and forgetful, obviously, because they're dead tired. But no, you couldn't possible take a break, to return to work with your mental faculties back in tact. One wonders how they manage to pull of their marvolous public transport system, big multinational corporations and life, while a little university festival leads to minutely overmanaged beaurocratic mayhem. Oh yeah, we weren't allowed to make most German foods. Milk is dangerous, things that might get cold don't sell, things that contain a lot of finely chopped vegetables are dangerous (knives), we couldn't possible make soup, because the Russians in the stall next to us are making soup and who's ever heard about to stalls selling DIFFERENT soups right next to each other!? (could'n possible move the stall elsewhere, of course).
Anyway, it was a glimpse of Japan I'm glad to have seen, but really don't need to experience again. EVER! At least no one had to sleep in the kitchen this year.

Finally, a breather. The past two weeks were bordering on manic. Where to start... My undying love for Sushi might be a good point. Hmmmmm... no idea what exactly I was eating, but it was good. Very good. Us girls went to a little Sushi place a few stops from here with a few Japanese students. Was fun.
And arcade games are awesome! Kaching, and PlingPling, and BoingBumBang everywhere! And there was one where you could shoot raging Zombie hordes with a Plastic gun, as in virtual reality, like. ;) But it gets better: The following day I went to sing Karaoke. For three hours, starting at one. No, I wasn't dragged kicking and screaming, I actually went. On my own two feet and not under the influence of mind altering drugs. The other girls (two German, three Taiwanese) were graceful enough not to start wailing, loudly and painfully, at my utter inability to hit the notes I was supposed to be hitting. And after that we went to a little Okonomiyakirestaurant. Foood. Friend. I need food for stress relief. Not that I'm getting a lot of work done, but I constantly have this nagging, stressful, exhausting feeling that I *should* be. Still, the homework is becoming more manageable and all those tests kinda lost their terror. Instead, i joined the Art Club (poor things had some sort of emergency meeting, point of order: What to do with the weird foreign girl who doesn't undertsand a word of what's going on) and am involved in this wicked collaboration between the Northern European Studies department in Berlin, the university of Helsinki and the university of Aberdeen on Images of the North. What was supposed to turn into a small online seminar with six students from each university turned into a mini UN - well yes, all of us are currently enrolled at one of those universities, but really there're students from eight countries on three continents, now. Oh, and my roomate and i tutor this twelve-year old Japanese girls in German on Saturdays.
Speaking of weekends, Boogey's is my refuge. Real beer! Real music! Real party! Oh yeah, and half naked class mates occasionally. What is it with guys and the urge to take their clothes off in public? I mean, I know I'm quite happy with mine on.
Oh, and there was a school trip sort of thing last monday. First, we were carted off to some modern Art park. hm. Call me a philistine, but I'm bored to tears by 'yet another' Picasso/Moore/Nana/whatever. The food was good. Anyway, following that we were driven to this insane montain, surrounded by other mountains, with a view on Mount Fuji and a brilliant view over a valley with a bright blue lake. But the best thing was the Mountain itself: There were sulfuric, boiling hot springs everywhere, with steam rising from the rocks all around. Looked incredible. It also smelled of rotten eggs but that kind of added to the end-of-the-world charm. Which would have been perfect without the rampaging hordes of tourists (of which - i realize - I was one) and the ENOURMOUS souvenir shops. Japanese marketing takes things to a whole new dimension. By way of explanation: The mountain is famous for eggs boiled in those sulfuric springs. They turn pitch black and are supposed to prolong your life by seven years per egg if you eat them, apparently. Anyway, those eggs can be found all over the souvenir shops, along with plush-tofu-dolls and evil looking hello kitties - as dolls, plushy toys, cups, on plates, as sweets (custard pie pretending to be a sulfury smelling black egg, anyone?) you name it. My personal favourite was this one doll, with tiny white arms and legs, a huge black egghead, a mightily pissed off expression and little stink-lines emanating from its forehead.

Anyways,I'm sure I've forgotten a ton of things, but I'm about to drop off my chair and there'll be a Halloweenparty tomorrow night and I still need a costume.
Oh yes, and I once again experience what happens when lack of sleep turns into an adrenalin high. So please excuse random ramblings.

Nighty night,
hyper Deadhead.

Okay, as a word of warning: I'm not getting enough sleep, therefore I grouch. Beware of politically incorrect generalisations.

Japanese are annoying. At least right now. I'm tired, my brain is suffering from severe language overkill and feels like it's about to melt and I don't appriciate being paraded around like some kind of exotic monkey. It literally feels like that. At least right now.
We were 'asked' to attend this 'party' today (two of us were late, and the event absolutely COULD NOT start without all of us there, so everyone sat around silently for ages, waiting). We were asked to introduce ourselves in front of the entire crowd, including previously specified information, followed by a round of 'quizz the Germans'. Still lined up, we were each required to answer every single bloody question anyone came up with - in the order in which we were lined up!!! After that there was another one on one question and answer session. And that awful bottled green tea that tastes like it's gone off and has several cigarette butts swimming in it. All compulsory, of course. And after a whole day of classes and a test, I might add. So, I wasn't feeling my best already and of course it just had to be me who -in the land of pint-sized fashion elves - had to get cornered by the spotty troll with really bad breath, who's clearly never seen Dirty Dancing: This is my space, that's yours. Stay there.
Not only did he not part his teeth while he talked, he also insisted on repeating all those questions we were already forced to answer. 'Why do you study Japanese?''What interests you about Japan' Murder!!! Tim, Phil, Greg, Mike - all of you guys who haven't been here, basically: Don't be fooled, those questions may sound harmless but they turn into a powerful weapon of mass annoyance (I am annoyed, therefore I pun. Badly.), when asked a perceived 50.000 times in the space of a few weeks.
AND being stared at constantly is getting incredibly exhausting. Or tempting me to get my kit off and perform a south american fertility dance while standing on my head, depending on mood and circumstance. Grrrrr. Anyway. My rant for the day.

On the up side: The Game Show is approaching and I got 88.5 percent on The Big Evil Test.

... I need to compensate my significant lack of social life. Please? The work ethic around here turns out to be virulently contagious. It even got me. Well, I'm still fighting it. With videogames, movies, books and ciggie breaks *ahem*. We had our first Big Evil Test today, as opposed to the ordinary daily ones. We'll see. Much to my consternation those tests take place in last period right after lunch, which is unfortunate as my brain usually hisses a little white flag halfway through the morning's three-hour conversation class. The poor thing isn't used to this level of exercise!

Other than that... well, we were invited to a party by some of the Japanese ex-exchange students. Sounded like fun, until one of us discovered the GINOURMOUS Poster at the university gate. Turns out we are the party and expected to give little mini speeches.
The real fun will take place on sunday, however. We have to sing. At a very official sounding festival thingy. Anyone who's heard me try to hold a note before knows just how much of a public humiliation that is going to be. We were supposed to dance, too. Sober and on stage. Must have missed that... Woopsie.

But all that pales in comparison to the shining glory that is the Tokyo Game Show. My geeky littly heart does somersaults at the prospect of finally getting to see it on saturday. And come hell or high water - I'm going! I'll give you force of nature if anything tries to come between me and the Square Enix display.

Oh yeah, on yet a different note: I learnt the hard way to do my shopping BEFORE a crazy night out. The university including its halls of residence is situated on top of a pretty steep mountain and there're these stairs we have taken to calling The Wall - because that's just what it looks like when you stand before it - on the way to and from town. NOT FUN when you carrying several litres of water and a merry band of clog-wearing woodpeckers dancing Polka 'round your head.

Right, time for me to get back to work. Another two tests tomorrow. Oh yeah, and we'll have to write and hold a speech - in Japanese - for a speech contest. The winner will get to hold it at yet another festival. In front of heaven knows how many people. I don't think I have ever wanted to not win a contest quite this badly. And - all in the Japanese fighting spirit - I will work very hard to achieve my goal. *sharky smile*